Feelings

Yesterday I've met my future coach and he seemed nice. Then I've gone for a walk with some...friends? and danced a lot Bonamana with Joha. Now I'm in my bedroom and I've just realized that I'm really afraid of being alone and unloved. Not just talking bout having a boyfriend, no. I'm talking bout friends and family. Overmore about friends. I've been dreaming for a couple of nights the same kind of dream: Nobody loves me and everybody hates me and people always say stuff like "I'm so sorry, I try to but I can't, u don't like me"-i repeat, not in a LOVE mood, in a friendly and family mood, and I think that's worse. Well...but that's my life. DO I REALLY MUST TO BE IN THE HABIT OF BEING ALONE? And about the fact that my few friends live so far away from me right now I'm really worried because I really NEED them but probably I'm just letters on a screen, am I?
Someday I'll probably end like Britget Jones, fat, single and singing "All by myseeeeeeelf don't wanna beeee, All by myseeeelf anymooore"
PD: The Fuckin' laptop doesn't wanna upload my pics! ¬¬